These are not always original, some were taken from other sites, but this is a compiled result of our favorites.
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Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris does not have a control key on his keyboard- Chuck Norris is in control.
Chuck Norris is so powerful, he can pee his name into concrete.
When Chuck Norris farts, it makes the atmosphere 20 feet thicker.
If Chuck Norris has five dollars, and you have five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
Chuck Norris does not pay insurance- the insurance company pays him.
Chuck Norris cannot be watched, for Chuck Norris is always watching you.
Jesus can walk on water, and Chuck Norris can swim on land.
Chuck Norris pees red bull.
Chuck Norris can slam revolving doors.
Chuck Norris killed Medusa by staring her straight in the eye.
When Chuck Norris talks, Everybody listens... and then dies.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a weapon, he is one.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
